Finals are Done!

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Finals are done! ¬†I think I did OK. ¬†I felt good when I left my criminal law exam, until I started listening to my classmates. ¬†I found everyone after the exam began second guessing, and picking the exam apart. ¬†Where at one point I was almost skipping out of the exam thinking I handled it much better than I anticipated–to questioning my choices, and realizing I had forgotten to mention the “apparent safety doctrine.”

One hour is not a lot of time to have for complete analysis of a hypothetical scenario. ¬†I kept remembering what a few attorney’s at work advised me, “don’t spend too much time on one essay. ¬†Allow “x” amount of time and when it’s up…move on.” ¬†I knew that not completing the test was far worse than missing a few items. ¬†I didn’t miss any major issues, and I did manage to define almost every single definition, and finish with a few minutes to spare.

I keep telling myself that a model answer is just that.. the ideal answer almost perfect. ¬†I wish to reach that level. ¬†But, it was my first test and in all honesty I think I did about 75% of the model answer. ¬†At least I hope I argued my view of the crime sufficiently if it differs from his. ¬†He said it doesn’t matter if we disagree with him, as long as we recognize the issue and argue our point of view. ¬†I have to wait now two weeks for the results. ¬†Ughhh!!! ¬†I wish I hadn’t listened to the others. ¬†I know now why I like to be alone. ¬†I don’t need any negative energy in my head. ¬†I feel confident about what I am doing. ¬†I studied like I was supposed to. ¬†I need to trust that. ¬†I do. ¬†I am starting a first time juvenile offender mediation program this week. ¬†I am excited about trying to make a difference in kids who are at a fork in the road, and hope to help somehow keep them from choosing a path that leads to the criminal justice system.

I have to socialize with others, because its impolite not to. ¬†But, I really don’t want to. ¬†I wish my class was larger so I could just do my own thing and not have to bother being social with anyone.

I started back doing light jogs.  I am averaging about 6 miles a week.  Nothing major.  But, I have to say my head does feel clearer and emotionally I am stronger when I exercise.  I think emotionally I am just trying to transition everything and manage it.  I have a light load this summer and hope I am able to keep up the running a bit more.

Almost Finals…

I am totally procrastinating doing my homework right now. ¬†I decided to give my brain something different to write about and update my blog! ¬†School is going great. ¬†Sure, it’s hard work. ¬†But,it doesn’t really feel like work to me. ¬†I am enjoying it. ¬†Even when my mind feels like pudding and I don’t think I can remember one more thing- I still love it.

I found that I particularly like Criminal Law at the moment. ¬†I think everyone does at some point. ¬†It seems to epitomize what we are conditioned to think of when someone says the word Lawyer. ¬†I didn’t think I would enjoy it as I am a highly sensitive person. ¬†I have trouble dealing with the dark side of life that exists. ¬†The weird thing is I can handle hearing about murder and the circumstances surrounding the crime. ¬†I can handle rape; we ¬†finished that topic before spring break. ¬†I can handle most things associated with criminal law, as long as none of it involves children. ¬†I can’t do it.

I think my criminal law professor is a legal rock star. ¬†He completely gets it when I told him how hard it is for me to read the cases assigned involving terrible crimes against children in our homicide chapters. ¬†It seems many of them involve children in at least one example of everything we cover. ¬†I realize now its by design. ¬†Children are supposed to be our jewels and protected. ¬†It emotionally causes many people to act from a place of passion. ¬†I have to try and see beyond the emotional rage or sadness and see the reasoning of why the law was applied the way it was. ¬†I don’t always agree. ¬†But, many of the cases we read are really hard to call cases and not of the norm. ¬†But, it teaches us to see the reasoning of the case law that proceeded before it and how the legal rule applies.

Our legal system is really quite fascinating and wonderful.  Even though sometimes the bad guy gets away.

What I was getting at before I digressed… my professor let me skip one of the horrible ones. ¬†He took over my brief and discussed it without me having to go”there”. ¬†He is very respectful and told me basically there is no shortage of calloused attorney’s in the word, and I can take my time trying to get through some of those. ¬†He also has given me a gift of seeing things in a different perspective. ¬†He can explain things in a way that is completely mesmerizing. ¬†He has a way of helping me see that sometimes good people do bad things. ¬†It’s better to not falsely imprison one innocent man if it means letting a few bad ones go. ¬†I get it. ¬†I do.

I love all the professors I have. ¬†I think they’re all super talented teachers and I am getting the education I was hoping for.

I try really hard. ¬†I honestly make a tremendous effort to be the best student I can be. ¬†I know I am putting the time and effort in. ¬†I don’t want to be a half assed attorney. ¬†I want to be a great attorney. ¬†I am trying to take everything in. ¬†It doesn’t guarantee I will test well on the final. ¬†However, It won’t be because I wasn’t prepared.

I hope I can break all my issues and rules down to the level they need to be dissected and explained on the hypothetical. ¬†However, in knowing that- I don’t think I will let that happen.

I have always wanted to be top of my class in anything I have pursued. ¬†If I speak up too much people view you as a pain in the ass. ¬†But, I have always been pretty self assured and trust my inner compass. ¬†It’s my education. ¬†I can’t worry what others think of me. ¬†I am respectful and mindful to not take away a learning opportunity from anyone else. ¬†I know the balance. ¬†However, I also know if I am not sure of something I need to ask. ¬†I want to be good not average. I have found I don’t really want to study with anyone. ¬†I am happier studying alone. So, that is the update if anyone was wondering. ¬†If not, no worries writing is so therapeutic. ¬†I definitely do this more for me anyways. ¬†:)

I will post again after finals.  I am already looking forward to next semester!

 

 

 

My 26.2

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I have been M.I.A. from my blog for 7 months my stats tell me.¬† I haven’t been running except the odd mile or two once in a while.¬† It’s so bizarre, because at one time I was so passionate and happy to doing it.¬† I admit I was in the best shape I had been in a while, but it lost its loving feeling for me, unfortunately.¬† However, I do give¬†running credit for motivating me and quite honestly giving me the confidence to go back to school.¬† I even used finishing my two half marathons in my personal statement when I applied to law school.

Training and finishing the two half marathons in 2014 taught me how to power through mentally.¬† When I took on the goal of completing a half marathon it was completely foreign and totally out of my comfort zone.¬† I can honestly say it was never something I thought I’d hear myself say out loud, “I just signed up for a half marathon!”¬† Going to law school was. I have always wanted to be a Lawyer.

Everything happens in the way it’s supposed to I reckon.¬† I needed to know what it feels like to not quit.¬† I had to show myself I do know how to cross a finish line.¬† I didn’t finish the half marathons in an impressive time, but I finished, and that was the lesson I needed.¬† To know how it feels when something is hard, and challenging in ways I would never expect, yet the rewarding life lesson that I can do it.¬† The half marathon was my training for law school, and now law school will be my 26.2!¬† I start Tuesday.¬† I know its going to have its own challenges and at times I will have to power through, but I will remember to breath and keep my eye on the finish line; this is my marathon.

Dublin, Ireland AND a 10 K !

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I set my first goal in about a year. ¬†I signed up a for a 10K in Dublin, Ireland next month. ¬†What’s funny is when I started this blog 2 years ago my goal was to run the London 10k. ¬†This is close! Funny how when you put something out into the Universe it seems to come to realization. ¬†It might not be right away, but many times I can trace back to the exact moment I visualized it. ¬†My next visualization is Law School graduation in 4 years…. ¬†We’ll revisit that.. ha ha..

After a year of trying to heal my foot.. I FINALLY feel like its better.  After the second cortisone shot with stretching and massaging the foot with a golf ball that seemed to do the trick.

The podiatrist gave me the green light to run again, and I am taking it very slow building the feet endurance back up. ¬†This week I am running 2 miles at a time 3x with a bit of cross training mixed in. ¬†This mornings 2 miles felt good. ¬†No lingering foot pain afterwards. ¬†If everything keeps up as it’s been going I am not worried about being ready for the 10k next month. ¬†I will be up to it.

I am looking forward to a new race in a different country to keep things exciting. ¬†It’s a chip timed race which I love. But- it didn’t ask for a shirt size. ¬†I am assuming there isn’t a shirt involved which is a bummer. ¬†Anyways, the race is the¬†Duleek 10k¬†just outside of Dublin, Ireland. ¬†I can’t wait for my trip!

Watch “AMBITION – MOTIVATIONAL VIDEO 2015 (feat Les Brown,Eric Thomas,Will Smith)” on YouTube

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I watch these videos and follow Eric Thomas on Facebook and YouTube to keep me motivated in following my dream. It reminds me why I am starting and where I am going.  We all have it in us.  It’s just a matter of going after it.  I am not afraid to go after it.. 

A New Journey

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“We cannot wait at our point of origin and hope that illumination will find us. ¬†We must take the first step, and only then will the path begin to unfold before us.¬†‚ÄēKim Huggens, Tarot Illuminati

‚ÄúAlice had begun to think that very few things indeed were really impossible.‚ÄĚ
‚Äē Lewis Carroll, Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland

I haven’t blogged in a while. ¬†I haven’t done anything in a while. ¬†In the last few years I have filled my life with goals and achievements that were extremely foreign to me. Goals I never would have ever thought I was capable of. ¬†In a way I like to think everything I have been doing has lead me to what I am about to do. ¬†I am going back to Law School.

Law School is all I have ever wanted to do. It’s a huge undertaking and for one reason or another I haven’t been able to really go after it. ¬†In a way it’s probably why I started setting my goals on things that were hard for me to do.. like running a half-marathon. ¬†I have been extremely unfulfilled. ¬†I haven’t had the mental stimulation or challenging situations in my career life, so I created something to give me that passion for something I was craving.

Running did that. ¬†I was so fired up with this goal to focus on I even started a blog! ¬†It has given me what I needed to help show me the way. ¬†When I finished my first 5k I remember crying with pride. ¬†That was a huge accomplishment for me. ¬†When I finished my first 10k in the time I set for myself, again I was thrilled. ¬† I remember while running that 6.2 miles thinking to myself at mile 5, “How will I ever do 13.1?” ¬†It felt that hard. ¬†But, I did. ¬†I finished two half marathons -granted not in the time I wanted, but I finished. ¬†I went the distance.

All of this showed me I am capable of doing something if I set my mind to it.  I can go the distance.

I needed to prove to myself I can do things that are hard. ¬†I know what its like to cross a finish line. ¬†Those were important lessons for me. ¬†I let the self-doubt voices in my head sometimes talk to loud. ¬†It’s not that I don’t think I am intelligent enough to handle Law School. ¬†I feel confident I most certainly am. ¬†My fear is going the distance.

I have to work during the day. ¬†I don’t want to carry student debt, so I will go to night Law School. ¬†At my age, the dream of working for Google, or some high-fluting fancy establishment that cares what top tier school one goes to is not realistic. ¬†It’s not worth carrying over $100,000 debt to compete with 30 something year old’s who need that high profile position to pay for that kind of student debt. ¬†I am starting too late in the game for that scenario–which is another reason I knew I had to go for it. ¬†Once I hit my 40’s I realized time is not a luxury I have to make everything happen. ¬†I need to act on it, or live with it. ¬†I will regret it if I don’t go for my dream. ¬†I have to try.

I am happy to have the opportunity to attend a school that will qualify me to sit for the California State Bar- pass and then figure out what I want to do when I get to that bridge. ¬†We’ll see when I get there. ¬†For right now I am focusing on one mile at a time… Continue reading

New Challenge, New Goal and New Bike !

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I haven’t written lately, as I have been dealing with a really painful case of plantar fasciitis- even a cortisone shot hasn’t healed me enough to resume running.

I have missed having a goal. ¬†I miss the structure of a training plan and having something to work for. ¬†I have never thought about cycling, not really. ¬†I have cycled in the sense of adding it to my cross training. ¬†I would take out my husbands second hand mountain bike and ride 9-10 miles. ¬†It felt heavy and after about 9-10 miles I was done. ¬†In reality it probably wasn’t the best for road riding, in which that was what I was doing! ¬†But, it served it’s purpose.

About a week ago I got the idea.. why don’t I sign up for a bike event? ¬† A beginner event with low mileage- I found an event that has a 35 mile, 62 mile or 100 mile choice. ¬†I could start with the 35 mile ride as something to work towards. ¬†But, first I need a bike.

Ok, here again, I have never researched bikes or what I need. ¬†I asked around and was told by a few people who have much more experience (and actually know what they’re talking about) that I should get an entry level hybrid bike. ¬†OK, sounds good! ¬†Now, where do I go…?

I began looking on Craigslist for used bikes. ¬†I know that I want decent bike. ¬†I want something respectable, but I also don’t want to break the bank and buy something completely out of my league for a hobby I just decided to undertake. ¬†If I could get something in between?

I was lucky! I got a little better than just in between.. better than I ever expected to be available to me. ¬†I ended up getting a Marin Fairfax SC5 hybrid bike, she’s a 2014 model, but brand new. ¬†I love her! ¬†She rides so smooth, and fast! ¬†Wow, what a difference a nice bike makes! ¬†She retails for about $1200.00 at the Marin Bikes Factory Outlet store in San Francisco. ¬†But, they were offering 20% off, also- and that was for a 2015 model. ¬†A 2014 can probably be found for even less than that. ¬†Marin Bikes has a solid history and is owned and run by bike enthusiast’s . ¬†They know what they’re doing! ¬†I also live in the area and want to always keep it local-which is not hard with a bike that has such a solid reputation world wide.

I am so excited to get started on this new adventure. ¬†I have a lot to learn about my bike and how to take care of her. ¬†It’s really the first nice thing I’ve ever invested in outside of my cars for myself. ¬†I can honestly say I don’t think I have bought myself anything at this level before. ¬†It’s not like it’s terribly expensive, but I have always had bikes purchased from K-mart, or Costco, etc. ¬†I was fine riding anything we had laying around. ¬†This is different.

I am excited to have a new goal, and something new to learn about. ¬†I am excited because I actually think I will be better at this than running. ¬†It’s less torture on my body. ¬†Running just beat the shit out of me, and I was always fighting some sort of injury. ¬†I feel like its too violent on my body. ¬†I still love it. ¬†And, I actually would like to come back to it. ¬†But, I have to heal, and that is going to take a lot of time. ¬†I joke with my husband and say, “I wanted to get fit, and do something that was healthy and good for me. ¬†Since I started running I have never had so many problems with my health as I do NOW.. how ironic is that?”

I have that enthusiasm back for something, and am excited to take on my new challenge. ¬†I will post a picture of my new beloved. ¬†I haven’t named her, yet. ¬†I joke she is my 3rd daughter!

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I Took the Cortisone Shot! (as well as found a great healthy cookie recipe!)

After 5 months of pain from Plantar Fasciitis I opted for a cortisone shot.   I have to say, so farРI am glad I did it.  I, of course, know I am not off the hook and need to continue my physical therapy of stretching, ice, massage, taping helps, orthotics for my shoes (Green Superfeet work great for me) to heal properly.  But, the pain was so excruciating and none of those things seem to be helping me heal.

Also, I need to work harder on my diet. ¬†I have to lose weight. ¬†I do good for a few days, and then I totally blow it a day or two and then go back. ¬†I am not going to make progress if I don’t get as serious about my diet as I have with my exercising.

I have researched healthy snack ideas and planned things for the week.  I have cute containers to portion control and have found some recipes to make treats without flour, sugar, etc.  My favorite one I tried this weekend was Quick Oatmeal banana cookies!

I used two very ripe bananas, about a cup (I eyeball measure) of quick oatmeal oats, and raisins (You can add some dark chocolate chips, or nuts, also). ¬†That’s IT. ¬†Mash it all together (don’t use too many additions or I read the oatmeal wont stick together as well). ¬†Also, grease (I use pam non-stick spray) your cookie pan well so nothing sticks -that could be a nightmare. ¬†Here is the link of of the recipe for any other ideas or questions¬†http://www.theburlapbag.com/2012/07/2-ingredient-cookies-plus-the-mix-ins-of-your-choice/¬† . ¬†I baked them at 350 degrees for 15 minutes like they said. ¬†They were so yummy warm! ¬†It was like eating an energy bar. ¬†They didn’t last more than 20 minutes in my house. ¬†My little one kept asking if she could have another. ¬†I said sure, there is nothing in them that isn’t healthy for her. ¬†She can have as many as she wants. ¬†My husband loved them and kept going back for another. ¬†I loved them. ¬†They smell great, too.

So, I am trying. ¬†I have lost 5 pounds only so far.. it should be more if I was more successful keeping the food out of my mouth. ¬†It’s the hardest thing ever! ¬†I know what I have to do. ¬†I have done it in the past more than once. ¬†It’s just doing IT !!

Today is a new day, and I can make it a good day.  Hope you do too!

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